Once again I feel like referring to my late holiday, specifically the wedding party I attended on Saturday of two weeks ago. I found myself seated at a table with one of my brothers and two of my cousins plus their respective boyfriends. We sat down in conversation about an array of subjects, and one of them was the subject of love and relationships.
One of the guys, naturally, asked if I had a girlfriend and I told him that I didn’t, along with my general predicament. To me delight, I found they were rather supportive and assured me that the time will come. We both discussed the idea of negativity melting away in love and intimacy and the power of love to bring our darkest desires to brightest places. Desires are thus not suppressed or sublimated, but rather they are directed towards, or transmuted into, joy and bliss. As soon as we got to that point, I mentioned that this was the principle of Tantra, in which so-called sinful desires and essences can become bliss, joy, even enlightenment.
It was very interesting for me to think of it that way, because at least there is a viable connect to Hindu and Buddhist ideas. It means allowing my self to experience a transformation pertaining to my desires without surrendering my desires. It offers a new perspective, that we should keep our desires so that they may grow into bliss and be directed towards greater dignity, love, and joy.
Of course, this can only be an experiential phenomenon. I can try to imagine it but I still long for the experience of it. I cannot take comfort in a mere theoretical analysis of such a phenomenon.